We’re born in this world as individuals with no understanding or connection of other people. But as we grow, we become closer and closer with other people. We start cherishing family, bonding with friends, and loving significant others. Through the relationships we develop in life, we learn to trust other people. Sometimes that trust comes quickly and other times it takes years to develop true trust with someone.
But the trust we give to others is not always in our best interest. Over time we inevitablely get that trust broken. We learn that trust should be earned not given. And the reality is there are people that will take advantage of that trust. But not everyone has those intentions. Some people will forever cherish your trust and reciprocate with their own. We have to separate the two. So who do you trust and why?
Here’s who I trust and my thoughts on why.
Trust is a very complicated subject when it comes to dealing with other people. There’s so many moving parts when it comes to who you should and shouldn’t trust. There’s no perfect strategy for deciding when you should trust someone. Some people are more lenient and trust anyone who trusts them. They give and take. Other people will simply go off their gut instinct. I like that person. I can trust her. Then there are the people that will simply be stubborn as a rock. They trust over long periods of time.
I’m more of the latter. I’m never quick to trust someone I don’t know. There’s no way to truly know someone’s character and their overall values. I don’t know if someone will kill for money or fight over food. There’s so many stories of friends or family killing people over a couple hundred dollars. It’s sad but that’s the reality of life. Everyone is working under different algorithims and motivations. The best thing to do is align yourself with people that have the same values as you.
But you can only really do that over years of getting to know someone. Every conversation or situation will give you a better picture of how this person works. When you know the ins and outs of their brain and heart it will give you more confidence to trust them. Slowly over time you’ll be able to trust that person in varying situations. And that’s how trust should be built over time. That’s how I build trust with friends and even strangers.
When it comes to some of level of trust building over time there are a handful of people I think of. It’s my close friends and family. The people that I spend a lot of time interacting with are the ones I know best. And therefore, they are the ones I will trust more if they have values that align with mine. I don’t have to name their names. They know exactly who they are. They are the ones I call on in the toughest of situations.
But the sad truth is you can never completely know someone and what’s in their heart. And because of this simple fact, I answer by saying the only person I truly trust is myself. I know everything I feel, think, and believe. I know my motivations inside and out. I know my heart and mind to the core. And realistically, I know I’ll always act in my best interest. I cannot truly say that for anyone else in the entire world.
So I’m realistic with my expectations. I understand other people but I can’t trust anyone one hundred percent. Even if someone has always kept my trust my whole life, chances are they’ll eventually let me down. That’s me being honest. So the only person I will fully trust in my life is myself. I’ve learned that to be the best decision. Everything else is under the pretext that the person just might fail me. That’s life though. Who do you trust and why?