What did life teach you yesterday?

There’s no better teacher than life itself. When we’re stubborn life has a way of teaching us things the hard way. When we think we know it all, life has a way of teaching us the one thing we don’t know. When we want to learn something quickly, life has a way of teaching it to us slowly and thoroughly over years. Life is the ultimate teacher. The lessons we learn in life serve to make us better in life. And from the moment we’re born to the day we die we’re learning something. Imagine having a teacher that teaches you twenty four seven, three hundred and sixty five days a year.

Where our parents slack, life will pick it up. The lessons our teachers skip, life will double down on. We learn everything from how to befriend others to staying healthy from the lessons of life. But we often forget the lessons we learn in life the same way we forget the formulas our highschool calculus teacher taught us. And when we forget life lessons, life just teaches us again in a harder and tougher way. So you should try to be cognizant of the lessons you learn in life. Take the time to learn your life lessons the first time not the third. You just have to be aware of what life is teaching you and why. So what did life teach you yesterday?

Here’s a short story on what life taught me yesterday?

When I ended the call I felt so bad for her that I felt the urge to kill myself. I wasn’t prepared for this reality. All I’ve ever wanted was to see her happy but now I was watching her crumble from the inside out. I guess I was more emotional than I’ve always thought growing up. Who do you know that feels so bad for others that they want to die? I’ve never felt this way before. But I was helpless and because there was nothing I could to do help. So I sat on the bed thinking of how I ended up in this situation. I saw it coming from a mile away but could of never imagined how dark it would truly be.

Two years before I started abusing my prescription pills. I spent my whole life taking strong opiate painkillers. It was tough dealing with sickle cell pain crises as a kid. I rarely had any other option when my pain went over a level four. And that was pretty often. So my pediatricians and hemotologists would prescribe me lots of painkillers. And I would use them to stay out of pain on field trips, at school, on vacation, or just at home on a normal day. But it wasn’t until two years ago that I took one of these pills for just the sake of it. It wasn’t a treatment anymore. It was something I took for recreation. And all it took was a handful of times.

I started abusing my medicine for the most random situations. I would take it when going to parties or events. It would ease my social anxiety and help me break out of my shell. I was a much more positive and outgoing person when high on oxycodone. I would take a pill when I was sad and feeling alone at night. I would take a pill when I couldn’t sleep and was having insomnia. And I would take my pills on vacations or before doing something fun and exciting. Two years of abusing pills for recreation led me into a drug addiction. And I’m not surprised. These drugs are some of the easiest in the world to become dependent on.

I went into a downward spiral in my life. I wouldn’t care to do anything productive or valuable for my life. I would lay in bed and watch Youtube. I would sit in bed and play games. I would prop up in bed and eat junk food. There was nothing I cared to do except be high and be lazy. It was fun for the first month or two. But eventually I became a living zombie. I didn’t know how much of my life was passing me by as I laid in bed for days at a time. My physical health started deteriorating. My friendships started withering away. And my business started declining at a rapid rate.

My soul was begging to do and be more with my life but I was stuck in a body strung out and high on painkillers. It was horrible. Then I went through a point of trying to detach from these parasitic meds. I immediately went into an intense and tortuous withdrawal phase. It was one of the most uncomfortable and agonizing experiences of my life. I contemplated flat out suicide multiple times. I relapse on my drugs multiple times. But I ultimately I dragged myself through this harsh withdrawal by the skin of my teeth. I wouldn’t wish that experience on my worst enemy. After all of this, I noticed my close friend started smoking weed recreationally.

It was the last thing I expected from her. But we all try new things for fun and pleasure sometimes. What I really didn’t expect was to see her become a full blown weed addict over the span of a month. Before it could get farther, I pulled her to the side and gave her personal advice. I saw the dark side of drugs and things that alter the human physiology. And it gets really dark. I told her to be careful. I told her I didn’t want to see her struggle like I did. I told her the high today won’t be worth the pain tomorrow. She continued smoking more and more weed over the next few months. It was hard to watch.

But nothing crushed my spirit more than getting a random text from her one night that read, “I need help.” And in that moment I instantly knew. The one thing I feared the most finally came to fruition. Now I had to watch someone I loved try to fight through one of the most painful experiences in life. An experience I just finished fighting and clawing through. I lost my soul in that fight and I’m still recovering to this day. When I got that text yesterday, I realized that sometimes people have to learn things the hard way in life. We can’t save anybody in life. We can only put our hand out. It’s up to them to grab on.

My hand will always be out for you DeAsia. I love you.

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