What confuses you?

Most things in life aren’t simple and to the point. Pretty much everything we’ve learned to this point has been taught to us in some way. Maybe a teacher in middle school taught us how to multiply numbers. Maybe our parents taught us how to wash dishes. And maybe we even taught ourselves how to do a cartwheel. But majority of the things we know and understand were taught to us in some way. And that goes for being self-taught too. That’s because life is full of complex subjects. The idea of the morning and night isn’t something a baby should perfectly grasp. It might take some time to explain what the sun is and why we do things when we can see it. It might take some time for a child to understand what money is and why it’s so important in our everyday lives. And it might take a while to get a child to understand what it means for someone to die.

Life is filled with intricate ideas and concepts that often take time to truly understand. That being said, we understand so much. We learn so much as humans and grasp things really well. We understand that food sustains us and gives us energy. We understand that gravity is the force that keeps everything pulling towards the surface of Earth. We understand that money compounds over time and creates more money easily. Well many of us don’t understand compounding interest but we should really take the time to. The point is there are many complex ideas but we usually understand most of them. Sometimes we don’t understand subjects. But that’s different than being confused by something. Some things we don’t understand and we get more confused trying than before we started. Maybe those subjects should be a point of focus. So what confuses you?

Here’s my thoughts on what confuses me.

Geography confuses me. I was never really good at locations. Since I was a kid I struggled trying to remember different places I had been before. It always took five or six times being somewhere before I really started getting to understand the place. And that lack of a mental compass has applied to my world geography as well. I really suck at figuring out where certain countries and regions are on a map. I know the general things like North America and Africa. But the minute we start talking about country names or seas, I immediately get lost. It’s not even just on a world level either. We can stay just within the confines of the United States of America. I get confused by states and city names all the time. I forget whether Chicago is a state or Illinois is the state. I forget the general area of the state and which section it’s in.

I get really confused when it comes to anything with geography. Maybe I need to spend more time traveling different parts of the world. Another thing that confuses me a lot is emotions. I know emotions are important and they’re a part of the human experience. But for whatever reason, I feel really out of touch with my emotions sometimes. I feel sad but then kind of feel motivated. I will depressed but inspired at the same time. I will feel angry and not be able to properly pinpoint what is making me feel that way. I will feel emotions for something that make we want to do something but end up doing the exact opposite. Sometimes my emotions go to war with the logic I have in my head. And I’ll end up jumping from one decision to another for weeks at a time trying to make the right choice. I get confused with my emotions very easily.

But what’s even more confusing than my emotions, is the emotions of others. I get confused by other’s emotions almost on a daily basis. People we say they feel one way but their actions will tell a completely different story. I would be stuck in this limbo trying to decide whether I should react to the actions or the words they say. People will often say they love you and care deeply for you. And then in the same breath say they hate you and can’t stand being around you. Again, I get stuck in limbo wondering if I should just give them the benefit of the doubt or take every word they say as their truth in that moment. It’s hard to read people based off their emotions. It often seems very clear and straight-forward because a sad person looks sad. But when a sad person looks sad, says their angry, but acts happy you end up very confused. And that’s just the way most people operate.

Another thing that confuses me is the way people lie to themselves. So many people speak on their lives with strong conviction. They often say things about wanting to be rich or needing to get their lives together. They often speak about all the change that they’re bringing into the new year. They often speak about all that they’ve figured out and how they have really big plans. And it’s all great to speak about those things. But then when you observe the actions those people take, it’s often the exact opposite. Most people sell themselves short on their dreams because they do the exact opposite of what they speak. It’s sad to think about but it happens every second. Somebody you know, including yourself, is probably talking about all the great things they want to do tomorrow. And for the rest of the year, they will only do the opposite. Actions speak louder than words.

It confuses me because I want to see people reach their goals. There’s few things more gratifying in life than helping someone reach their true potential. I don’t know if I’ve done that before in my life. But I do know it’s something that I aspire to do. I want all of my loved ones, friends, and family to become the greatest versions of themselves. I want strangers with genuine hearts and good intentions to reach their highest purpose. And I want to be the person that helps these people get from where they are to where they should be. But I can’t help but get confused when I try to help people that are all talk. They talk such big game but they never back it up. I try to get deeper in their core to understand what’s stopping them from their journey to greatness. But I often just see a person that is focused on immediate pleasure rather than delayed gratification. All the while, they continue talking up all the great things they have in store.

It’s a frustrating situation to be in. It makes me, the person who wants to help, feel helpless. No matter what angle I approach the problem from, it only stays the same. The people just keep doing what they’re doing never changing or growing for the better. And sometimes the problem even gets worse. And no matter how much I want the success for them, I can’t do it for them. It’s a sad reality. And it’s a really confusing one as well. Life can be a very confusing place at times. Everything is so much deeper and complex than we realize. Geography is simple to you but confuses the heck out of me. Emotional intelligence comes naturally for you, but I’ve struggled with it my whole life. And people dreaming of better days is normal to you, but confuses me. Life will be confusing. It’s up to us to find understanding in it.

I’m confused by new things all the time. But I don’t fear confusion. I fear the lack of desire to understand.

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