How many people do you love?

Love is one of the purest and most difficult mysteries of humanity. Everyone yearns for this feeling of happiness and finding the piece that makes them complete. But for something that’s forever in high demand, nobody has a simple explanation of what love is. Everybody and their mom has a different definition of true love.

You ask a high school girl and she’ll say it’s getting walked to class in the mornings. You ask a guy fresh out of college and he’ll say it’s his mom or a women that cooks like mom used to. Ask the right kind of lady and she’ll say getting designers purses and clothes. Everyone says something different because nobody really knows. Thank goodness for that rare person that gladv says I don’t know what love is. But despite that, there’s one thing we almost always get right… Who we love. So tell me, how many people do you love?

Here’s a real short story on how many people I love.

Growing up in school, I was asked often what my dream life looked like. Teachers wanted to know what a small child with an idealized vision of the world could infer about their future. We’ve all experienced them before… “Where do you want to live?”, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”, And worst of them all, “How many kids do you want to have” Most kids loved these questions and had their amazing go to answers.

But I was different. Instead of running with the answer society told me was right, I dug deeper. I ignored social pressures and would answer like, “0. I don’t want to get married or have kids.” It was shocking to people at first. But that’s what my reality was. And no one could tell me it was essentially wrong. Later in life I met a girl named Deasia that completely changed my outlook on life. Through her openness I evolved and decided I did want to have kids.

I wanted to have kids with whoever I truly loved, which was Deasia at the moment. And it would be a special accomplishment for the both of us. I later learned that Deasia wasn’t the perfect girl I thought she was. And I hated the thought of her and having kids. How could I have kids if there was no perfect person for me to love and have my kids with anymore. I’d have to spend years searching for the next perfect girl. And then I realized something even bigger from my experience with DeAsia.

There are no perfect people in this world. Everybody is human and humans are inherently flawed. So I stopped looking for perfection in others and started accepting the flaws we were all designed with. And now the older Tim finds it easier to love people for who they are. I don’t pick and choose to love the perfect people with the perfect lives. I love everyone and I open my heart to better understand everyone’s little imperfections. I love hundreds and thousands of people. It’s an infinitely growing number.

Thank you for teaching me how to love DeAsia. ♥️

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